Believe!

Today is the beginning of a new week. As I came home this morning from walking and kneeled down on my knees I was reminded how grateful I am to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints ( Mormon). I am so glad that I believe in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I am grateful for the Atonement and how it helps me in my life each day.



Last night was a longggg night I only slept maybe a hour. My body hurt from head to toe. It always seems to be my bones. I lay in bed tossing and turning(you all have had those nights) wanting to sleep. Every time I turned to lay another way my bones in my shoulder, neck,ribs, feet, legs and head hurt. As soon as it was light I forced myself out of bed to go walking. It feels good to be walking and look up and see the clear blue sky and feel the sun shining on me, but today as I tried to enjoy my surroundings I had to try to keep my emotions in check because my body hurt so bad. Eventually discouragement started settling in. Other walkers were passing me and I felt so alone and of course out of shape. I think the reason why I felt lonely was that I knew they (others) couldn't understand why I couldn't keep up with them or why it hurt so bad to walk.

I also have been very apprehensive (I'm not sure if that's the right word) this week. It is my year mark to when I knew something was wrong and I had to go in for two different biopsy's. I knew in my heart I had cancer and I was not letting other people know except my family and a close friend. I remember acting like all was alright as I was preparing my kids for school and sending my son off on a mission. Inside I was a wreck. I am surprised at how I am feeling now, I want Aug/Sept to be over. No surprises.

I went to Walmart today and ran into a lady that had Breast cancer too. I think Heavenly Father new I needed to see her. We were basically diagnosed at the same time. While she was talking I felt relief, although she was crying and I was trying not to. I felt the stress melt away. She feels the same way I do with so many things. I felt normal again.

I then took Savannah to the dentist Dr. P. and he told me that their 2yr was just diagnosed with Leukemia and his wife is due in 2 weeks with their 3rd child. He said it has been hard because his son is still too young to really communicate and tell them how he feels and where it hurts. Tears came to my eyes and I thought back to this morning and all I could think about was the Atonement and how important it is.

As I go to bed tonight I realize that I am truly never alone. I hope all of you feel the same way.

No Regrets,

Kennedy Center Bans Prayer at Beck Event - Meridian Magazine

Kennedy Center Bans Prayer at Beck Event - Meridian Magazine

"America the Beautiful" live at Jefferson Memorial with the Mormon Taber...

The Faith of Abraham Lincoln - Meridian Magazine

The Faith of Abraham Lincoln - Meridian Magazine

Well I hope everyone reading this blog enjoyed all the videos. I have never really been politcally involved but as I see our country changing, I am nervous actually scared for what lies ahead for my children, grandchildren.

I watched these videos and just wanted to share.

Feeling The Wind In My hair!

Last night my son was begging me to let him take me on a 4-wheeler ride. I finally gave in. You would be nervous for me if you could see how he drives. Anyway, as I along with Savannah and Asia were being chauffeured by Rudy; we were able to ride in weather that didn't feel like 110 degrees. It was nice, the evening air was cool and it felt good feeling the wind on my face and actually feeling it go through my hair! Yes, can you believe it my hair is still short but long enough to feel that I have some. It was awesome! It has been a long time feeling anything like that on my head. My hair is getting lighter and in the sun you see a little red.
We had been riding around for quite awhile and had started for home when all of a sudden the 4-wheeler starts slowing down and then finally stops. Yes we were out of gas. I told Rudy well I guess that ride is over and we both hopped off and started pushing the 4-wheeler home. As we were pushing we were laughing and blaming one another on who should have checked the gas when Rudy says "Mom its probably a good thing this happened because you didn't exercise this morning and now you can go to bed knowing you finally did". We then push a little further and I was dying my legs were burning and he looks at me and starts laughing and says"And doesn't this feel good". I agreed, especially since I was in my Pj's.
(Savannah pushed for a little while but ended up back on the 4-wheeler with Asia to help her steer.) Although we ran out of gas we had alot of fun !

What's Your Hobby?

Yesterday I went in to Joann's looking for some materials I needed for Activity days.
Well I might as well
been in a foreign country. I walked down each
aisle
slowly looking at everything. I see all different kinds of material,
needlepoint
(stuff), crotcheting yarn, knitting materials, ribbons,
scrapbook paper,
stamps, wooden boxes, paints, etc...I notice my heart
is
beating faster and I am
getting really hot, struggling to catch my
breath,
thinking to myself this store
is killing me. As I am trying to
breathe and
as I am talking to myself saying
and "you thought you were
crafty just
because you made a skirt 2o yrs ago in
Home Ec. well I think
Its time I
learn a new hobby." As I am saying
this I turn
the corner and low
and behold their sits a new sewing machine
that says
its for beginners. I
thought well maybe I should buy it and learn to sew. I read everything on
the box and then the thought comes to my mind
wait.......... I thought I was
going to learn more about my computer and how
it works and
how I can scrap
book on my computer. (I'm sure I don't have
time for
both). So I leave
the store without the sewing
machine ready to go
home and get back on
the computer and learn how
it really works. I decide
I will find some
relaxing hobby after I
am a expert on the computer. I am
driving home
excited thinking well
learning computer skills can be my new hobby and then
wait.....I remembered
that I was going to start focusing on sending
thank
you cards to so many
people from this past year and I was going to be organized
and remember
peoples b-days and just let them know I was thinking of them,
and
then I
thought no I was going to start focusing on cooking better, finding new recipes, so I could provide really healthy but good meals for my family and friends. Oh wait.....
I thought I was going to start taking more pictures and learn how my camera really works.
But then I get home put my comfy
pj's on
and thought to myself I know I was going to do something but I
can't
remember so
I crawled in my comfortable bed that was calling
my name
and fell
asleep.

This is the story of my
life. This is the honest truth of my thoughts today. Crazy I know!
And I don't like the outline of my blog but can't figure out how to change it. Maybe I should focus on my computer skills.